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Sword Play

Current Fight: Ash Williams Vs. Shaun (Shaun Of the Dead)
Bugs Bunny vs. Roger Rabbit
Buffy Vs. Blade
Sword Play
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The Waterboy Vs. The Longest Yard
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Iceman Vs. Sub-Zero
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Jason Vs. Johnny
The Thing vs. The Incredible Hulk
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Yoda vs. E.T
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Toucan Sam vs. Sonny
Aliens Vs. Slivers
Master Chief Vs. Samus Aran
Battle Of the Pranksters
King Kong Vs. Donkey Kong
Homer Simpson vs. Peter Griffin
The Orphanarium

The Set-Up:

"Welcome to the FNF arena once again!" a voice yells. "TONIGHTS FIGHT IS A GREAT ONE!"

The crowd cheers.

"We have taken 6 master swordsman, and given them LIGHTSABERS!" The voice yells again.
The crowd cheers.

"Let us meet the contestants!" The voice says.

"First up, LINK! He comes from Hyrule used to wielding the Master Sword."

"Next, Marth. He is a powerful swordsman and a prince of something!"

"Third up, ZORRO! He claims to be the best swordsman ever. Will he prove himself right?"

"Next up, he hails from Japan, SAMURAI JACK!"

"Please let us welcome, INUYASHA!"

"Finally, This lady who's trying to kill her fiance!"
"Let us have a good clean FIGHT TO THE DEATH! START!"


Well we have a six-way battle but only 3 commentators. I won't lie. This was done last minute so we didn't have time to come up with extra commentators. So do the same thing you did BOC.
Send your best comments to:
With the subject as Sword Comment.

It is a six-way battle of master swordsmen using Lightsabers. If you don't know what lightsabers are you shouldn't be on the internet.

The Fight:

Brad: Well it’s time for another exciting fight in the FNF arena! START YOUR LIGHTSABERS!

Well anyone who wants to know the Saber colors go as following:

Link: Green (duh)
Lady from Kill Bill: Red
Zorro: Purple
Samurai Jack: Blue
Inuyasha: Orange
Marth: Pink

Yeah. The last one baffles me too. Anyways the fight STARTS NOW!

It’s basically three 1 on 1 battles! They’re all focusing on one opponent.

Zorro has sliced a giant “Z” into Jack’s shirt. Jack rips his shirt off.

Inuyasha swings at Link. Link blocks with his saber. We got an old classic Light Saber battle between these two!

Now The Bride vs. Marth… uuh… Let’s ignore the puddle of blood coming from Marth’s headless body.

The Bride moves toward Inuyasha who is currently going nowhere with Link. She stabs Inuyasha through the chest. Then slowly moves up. Damn. This is bloodier than Jason vs. Johnny already!

Jack’s down to his underwear…like always when he’s in some epic battle. Zorro’s pullin’ off some fancy moves. Jack’s just stepping back. This is pretty sad. Why doesn’t Zorro just slice downwards on Jack?

Link and the bride are locked in combat. WOAH! Link has just disarmed The Bride! LITERALLY! No weapon. No right arm! Then there goes some more body parts. Who knew Link had it in him to dismember a human!?!

Zorro pulls off some more fancy moves. Jack just stabs him through his head. Finally!

The Results:

Link (48%)


Zorro (15%)

Samurai Jack (11%)

The Lady From Kill Bill (11%)

Inyuasha (11%)


Marth (4%)

Brad: Well Link and Jack are the only who remain! The two go at it! Link slashes at Jack. Jack can say good bye to flipping somebody off! DAMN! Link has slice Jack’s legs off! He jumps up. Aims the saber down. HE LANDS ON JACKS HEAD! Saber in tack!

Viewer Comment Of The Week:

J Dog- Six contestants, shall we! Well, I must say, this is one for the record books. Here is my stuff on the six:

InuYasha- A powerful warrior with the sword. He is strong, yes.

Marth- Another one who lives by the sword.

Zorro- The least likely to live. He knows how to use the sword, but...

Jack (no relations to Jack Stallwall, from my other comment in Battle of the Champions #1)- A powerful samurai. Likely to survive the first death blows.

The Bride- Another powerful one. Although, you might get confused on her

Link- The MASTER of them all

Here is how the fight goes, as me, Catbert, my friend Deven711, Homer Simpson, & Mimi Tachikawa shall call it.

J Dog: Look at that! Zorro is trying to spell the Z on Jack.

Mimi: Uh oh! Jack is reflecting the saber back.

(cut to shot of Zorro being sliced in half by himself, ala Darth Maul)

Catbert: As the fact that I have done another Lightsaber Fight (see, will you shut up, crowd!

Crowd: So?

Catbert: (pushes a can-o-matic button, as 30 people are flung out with Pink Slips on them)

Mimi: (unaware she is on) That was mean.

Catbert: You are on!

Mimi: Oh! Well, Jack is battling InuYasha.

(cut to shot of InuYasha slicing Jack)

Deven: Deew. Worse than a night with Stewie Griffin.

Homer: (fast asleep)

J Dog: Will someone wake him up?!!

(in the stands)

Pointy-Haired Boss: Did you see that?!!! Wow! Woo! Go!!! (takes off his shirt, & grosses out the crowd)

Dilbert: I hate nights with the Boss.

J Dog: Oh, look at that! Link is charging his Master Sword.

Link: HA! (slices through Marth)

Marth: What was that for?!!

Catbert: 3 Down, 3 to Go. (purrs)

J Dog: Ain't that the S.O.L.?

(cut to a shot of Mike & the Bots)

Mike: This is so much better than "Red Zone Cuba"!

Crow: Damn straight!

Deven: Uh... The Bride is slicing at InuYasha. And he goes down! It's Link vs. Bride.

(Meanwhile... two adepts appear)

Felix: A sword fight. And we wern't invited.

Isaac: Might as well hedge bets for Link.


(A titanous sword appears & slices through Bride)

All five commentators: Whoa!

Mimi: One for the record books. (a little goo gets on her hat) Eeew! Yucky!

J Dog: Stop whining. I just woke Homer up.

Homer: Wha...? What is it, 1987.

Homer's Brain: No! 2005! You just missed a match.

Homer: D'oh! Well, who won?

J Dog: Due to outside help, Link did.

Catbert: Uh.. outside help is forbidden.

J Dog: You seen E.T.'s friends showing up & going gung-ho on Yoda?

Yoda: Easy challenge, he was.

J Dog: Let's look at the camera. (glances) Hmm. Link cut through her with his green lightsaber. Now, she dropped her purple one & kneeled over BEFORE Ragnarok appeared.

Dale Gribble: (in crowd) Wingo!

Mimi: Well, Link has won it!

Dale: Double Wingo!

J Dog- How do ya like that?


Other Lesser Comments:

yeah, this isnt a good comment, but it wouldnt let me post it on the comment maybe you can post it.....thanks...~ "ZORRO ZORRO ZORRO!!!!! Well, Zorro kicks ass, but he will just say,"Fuck the lightsabers," and use his awesome sword OF DEATH!! RAWR!! So, Zorro wins cause he rules and everyone elsesucks...and i agree with the first comment posted, hes real, which is cool, and he has a moustach!! a moustache people! he should win just for having a moustache.ZORRO! -Psycho" ~ whoooo..yeah, thats it


Its Wateva, and Im back with an actual serious post. Jack takes it hands down, not only is he physically superior, he has taken down much better opponents. The only threat (Inuyasha) will be taken down in due time as Jack has still taken down better (Aku), so Jack has this wrapped up.-Wateva


It's Link. I know it is. He's got not one but a whole bunch of other swords like the Big Goron's sword and a Deku Sword. Heck, another sword he had shot out lasers and attacked everyone in its path! The only thing Link doesn't get is a kiss from Zelda. Heh. Anyway, I do kind of think a duel between him and Samurai Jack would be awesome. Link would win since Jack keeps getting stabbed until his kimino is ripped to shreds and he appears naked as he always does. Link'll stab through him and kill him. And that includes the other four contestants. Link is destined to win this tournament! -Deven711

They’re all using Lightsabers. No other weapons allowed.

zorro come on this guy is 1. real 2. the most experienced fighter here 3. he has a moustache. cmon this kicks ass.


Link takes the saber and slices Samurai Jack and Zorro's heads off. Inuyasha and Marth get disqualified for just being Link in different outfits.So nowit comes down to Link and Uma Thurman. The Bride(the characters actual name) tries to go get her husband,but the arena's security systems zap her to death. The winner is Link!


Seeing as how everyone here is used to a weapon with some weight in it, luck is going to be the key factor here since lightsabers are weightless.- Mr. Psychosis


Link takes it only because he has the goddess of courage nayru watching over him hence why he always has her triforce either on him or inside him. I mean really how can you beat the blessing of a goddess, and besides after wielding that big ass sword for as long as he has managing the relativley light wieght of a light saber should be childs play


I can't let the guy that mentioned Naru get away with that. Does Link's goddes aprove of him fighting other heros for no good reason? If not, then by your logic (not mine) Samari Jack and Marth have either the Kami or Budda on their side and Zorro has the almighty God on his side.

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